advice · Life's Milestones

My biggest regret

Okay so basically for any girl (and maybe anyone in general), your biggest regret stems off of something that has to do with a relationship. It’s pretty typical for someone to regret having a relationship with someone that they had dated. For me, my biggest regret is also something to do with a relationship that I had with someone who I shouldn’t have had a relationship with which then spiraled into a huge mess of drama in my friend group.

While the relationship itself was a complete disaster and mess, my biggest regret is not exactly the relationship. The relationship I had was a long distance one with someone who barely gave me the time of day and when he did, he was lying to me. Okay, so that wasn’t a great relationship to start. He cheated on me so many times that I had lost count and when he did they didn’t even affect me or make me upset anymore. I had made up excuses for him. “Oh we haven’t seen each other, of course that is going to happen”. BUT NO. No man in a serious relationship should EVER cheat on you and you should never convince yourself that cheating in any form is okay in a relationship.

Regardless of that, this relationship was very strong before becoming long distance. We spent a lot of time together. So much time that I had started to spend less time with my friend group. One of my friends got so jealous of the relationship and felt so replaced that she started spreading rumors about me (yay high school drama). She got mad when I would talk to her ex boyfriend (who was my friend first). She even got to the level of anonymously texting my then boyfriend to break up with me, my own father saying that since he’s letting me stay in this relationship that he doesn’t love me, and getting one of her friends to text me horrible things when he didn’t even know me.

After all of this, the drama kind of died down. I still didn’t hang out with my then friends, because how could I even consider them that after what they had done to me. We had to have meetings together with the vice principle of the school. For me, this meeting was not helpful at all, I was not even able to bring up anything without my “friend” making it come back at something I had done.

Later, I started becoming less involved with all of the high school clubs I was a part of in an effort to reduce the number of times I had to be around my old friends. After all, we had done basically everything together for the past 2 years. Even my school guidance counselor encouraged me NOT to be involved anymore and let my “friend” continue all of her involvements.

THIS, is my biggest regret. Not being involved in high school for the two years following. I had lost my entire friend group and never truly found real friends in high school. Despite this all starting out with a relationship gone wrong, it really ended up changing my entire life style. When I graduated high school, I decided that I would never hold myself back from anything for someone else’s benefit. I need to think about myself.

When I first came to college, my main mission was to find my friend group and get involved with groups on campus. I can proudly say that I am a member of 3 organizations on campus (and counting). I am also doing SO much better with courses and grades than I was in high school. I believe that this is because of the lack of drama in my life. Thank goodness people grow up and mature right?

Despite this huge regret of mine, I wouldn’t go back to alter or change it because it really made me into the person that I am today. I would not be where I am now if it weren’t for the events that occurred in my past. Every experience teaches you something in life.

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College · Life's Milestones

Since going to college…

This past year, I became a freshman in college. A lot has changed in just a short eight months and time has definitely passed by way too quickly. Simultaneously, I feel as though I have accomplished and grown so much in this short time span. Here are some of the things I have notices that changed after my first year in college.

Since going to college… I have become more independent. I always have been more of an independent person, but being away from my parents I could only rely on myself.

Since going to college… I have come out of my shell (a lot) more. Since I was little, I’ve always been a quiet person, shy as they call it. But on campus it seems that I am a completely different person than I was growing up, which isn’t a bad thing.

Since going to college… I have made so many new friends. I struggled with friends in high school so when it came to college I was pretty nervous about making friends that actually treated me well. But it turns out, thankfully, that most of the people you met in college are grown up and mature, unlike high school friends.

Since going to college… I have learned how to manage a busy schedule. Let’s be real, this is the first time you ever have to worry about school, eating three times a day and doing your laundry. Multitasking is definitely a skill that you’ll need in the future.

Since going to college… I have strived to do well in all my classes. I was warned that college courses are a bit harder than high school courses are, so I made sure I was well prepared for all of my exams, which paid off in the end when I made the Dean’s List all year!

Since going to college… I have gotten involved and tried many new things. I’ve always been apprehensive to try new things or get involved in a group where I didn’t know anyone. In college, I pushed myself to get involved and try new things.

Since going to college… I have become less of a picky eater. Dining food isn’t always the greatest and before coming to college I didn’t eat many foods. But the dining halls don’t cater to each person so, I had to try the food they had available to me.

Since going to college… I have become more of an adult. I am typically a responsible, trust-worthy person, but when I say I have become more of an adult I mean that I have learned how to manage my own time, and do it wisely.

Lastly,

Since going to college… I have found my second home. Being on my own was originally a scary thought for me. But I know now that I have found my second home on campus. I also know that I am where I am supposed to be, doing what I am destined to do.

life · Life's Milestones

My 30 By 30

I found this fun blog post idea while searching the internet a couple of months back when I was running low on blog ideas for the future. I had thought that it was pretty cool. So basically, it is a list of thirty things or goals or where exactly I want to be and what I want to accomplish in life before I turn thirty years old, in no particular order whatsoever.

Here is my “Thirty By Thirty” list:

  1. Graduate from college. A simple goal for most people in this generation as most high school graduates continue their educations with college degrees. The only thing that might be different in my case is that I am aiming to earn my Master’s Degree so I am able to teach in a classroom of my own.
  2. Travel. I have already traveled to a few places that were located out of the country. However, I really want to travel across Europe. I also want to explore some more of the Caribbean Islands and tropical places. I would also love to travel to see the Seven Wonders of the World, as well as some of the major landscapes in the United States such as the Grand Canyon.
  3. Get married. Obviously everyone hopes to find their true love and prince (or princess) like the Disney and Romance movies show. I am no exception to this. I hope that before I turn 30 I have found the love of my life and I hope to be married to them, although I suppose I could settle for engaged.
  4. Buy my first home. This is clearly a huge stepping stone in becoming an adult, having my own bills and mortgage to pay and being responsible for them. I really look forward to making my “Dream House” pinterest board a reality.
  5. Buy my first real (nice) car. It’s basically destined to happen that your first car is well, crappy and cheap. I look forward to owning a newer car that comes with being older and being a better more responsible driver. Of course, I need to get my license and first car before this can happen, but that’s coming in the near future.
  6. Go on a road trip. This goes along with having a car that is obviously dependable. But I want to someday (before the age of thirty) take a road trip across the United States. I want to stop at the major sight seeing spots along the way accompanied with some of my best friends.
  7. Study abroad. The only time you can really “travel abroad” is in your college years. I am hopeful that I am able to travel abroad to a foreign country and learn about the education systems in place there and compare them to the education systems we have here at the United States. We can learn a lot of different techniques for learning from other cultures.
  8. Face some of my fears. I tend to be really hesitant when it comes to trying new things or facing something that scares me. I want to be able to overcome some of those fears in the next fifteen or so years.
  9. Start a family. Scary thought when it seems so far out into the future but around the age of 30 I’ll probably want to start thinking about having a family of my own. Or maybe I’ll even already have started one. This one can definitely wait for a while longer, but someday.
  10. Have a family pet (or two). With the starting a family, along comes owning my first pet. I’ve grow up with having pets my entire life but this is the first time I would have my own, to myself that is.
  11. Meet my best friend. It sounds crazy but out of all the friends you have now, you still may have not met your best friend. I met my best friend on twitter who does these blogs with me, but we still have yet to meet in person.
  12. Exercise regularly. Basically I just want to stay healthy. I don’t really go to the gym that much now but I’d really love to start being more active.
  13. Have a job, that uses my degree. After studying my major for four years (and getting my Master’s after six) I’d really love to have a job in my field of interest. After all, college loans would be a waste if I didn’t use my degree!
  14. Run a 5K marathon. I am looking into doing the Color Run next year, but if that doesn’t work out there are tons of other 5K’s I could take part in. The hardest part would be getting myself motivated to train for them.
  15. Spend some time volunteering for an organization. I already volunteer for multiple organizations, but it’s such a rewarding experience. I love spending time with the organizations I volunteer for and want to continue to do so throughout the upcoming years.
    (Halfway there!)
  16. Spend more time with family. I have a huge family and family is extremely important to me. Spending time with my family is definitely something that I need to cherish now because you never know when the last time you’ll see someone is.
  17. Attend a major sports game. For me, I really love football. I’ve never been to a NFL football game, despite living only several miles from one of them. For you, you may have other sports that you enjoy and want to watch.
  18. Learn something new. This is kinda in simple form. I want to learn so many things that I don’t already know how to do. This could be anything from learning a new language to learning how to ski. Either way, I want to learn how to do something I don’t know how to do right now.
  19. Date someone who isn’t your “type”. It seems kind silly, why would you want to date someone different than everyone else you’ve dated in the past? But that’s exactly the reason why! This person might surprise you, after all, there’s a reason why your past relationships didn’t work out, am I right?
  20. Start saving for retirement. Not surprisingly, the earlier you start saving for retirement, the more you save and the sooner you can retire. I hope to start saving as soon as I can so I can enjoy many years without working when I am older.
  21. Pay off my college loans (and or credit card debt). Interest on student loans or credit cards is an awful thing. I want to be responsible with my money and pay off my debts as soon as possible.
  22. Become a better cook. Right now, my cooking skills are at a college level, some simple pasta and sauce, mac and cheese, nothing too fancy. But learning to cook a full meal now, and a yummy, healthy one for that matter, will help when it comes to living on my own!
  23. Attend my favorite singer’s concert. Or band, or whatever you listen to. I’ve seen a handful of concerts and they are always a fun time. However, there’s a few other artists that I really want to see on stage before I turn 30.
  24. Become a leader. I’ve always been someone who just follows somewhat in the paths of other people. I’ve never really had a leadership position. I hope to become a leader in some form of club or organization while I am attending college.
  25. Have a stable income. Money surely doesn’t buy happiness in any sense however, I think that it is important to be responsible with your money. It’s key to be stable in life before buying a home or starting a family.
  26. Make more friends. In high school, I didn’t have that many great friends. Since going to college, I’ve made a bunch of new friends and I hope to expand and grow our friendships over the course of my education, and then into the years to come.
  27. Become more organized. When it comes to certain things, like my school supplies, I can be extremely organized and put together. The thing I’m not that great at keeping clean is my room or desk.
  28. Watch the most popular TV series seasons on Netflix. I’ve seen a couple of TV shows on Netflix, but I definitely haven’t ventured into some of the most talked about, such as Orange is the New Black or Grey’s Anatomy.
  29. Get to know my family history. There’s tons of websites today that allow you to track back your ancestors. I find this extremely interesting and would love to see what pops up under my family tree.
  30. Make small acts of kindness. By this I mean paying for the next person in the drive thru’s coffee in the morning or giving some money or food to a homeless person. Sometimes the little things in life can mean the most to someone else.

And that’s that! Making this list was very entertaining and I loved thinking about what I wanted in the future. Some things were pretty obvious and came to me quickly. As I was finishing up my list, I had some trouble thinking of some other things I wanted to do before I was thirty. Overall, I enjoyed making this blog and hopefully some day I’ll look back at this and be able to check everything off as complete!

What’s on your 30 by 30 list?

Family · Life's Milestones

Everything Will Change

At the young age of ten, I became an Auntie for the very first time. Obviously because of my young age, I was the only person in my friend group who was going to be an aunt in the near future and I was beyond excited. I have always loved babies and young kids and couldn’t wait to have another baby in the family. Since I am the youngest child, having a new baby around was going to give me the opportunity to have the (close enough) little brother or sister I never had. Little did I know was that this little baby was going to make one of the biggest impact on my life. Not everyone gets to become an aunt and definitely a smaller part of those become an aunt at such a young age.

I always tended to be a bit of a brat when it came to getting what I wanted and I wanted to have a niece. Now imagine my reaction when my brother informed me that I was going to have a nephew. Exactly, not entirely thrilled, in fact, I almost kicked my mother in the face because I was so upset. This was probably one of my first lessons in becoming an aunt, you get what you get (and you don’t get upset).

My second lesson in Auntie-ing, as I call it, was sharing. Being the youngest child, I never really had to deal with sharing my possessions and my toys. I never actually noticed how bad at sharing I was until my nephew hit the age when he knew how to share with me. It was embarrassing at the least when my four year old nephew told everyone that his auntie didn’t share with him, ever. Of course, he asked for it when he dropped my Ipod Touch and shattered the screen.

Back to today, over the course of the past nine years, a lot has changed. First off, not only do I have one nephew, but I have fiveI tend to joke around that it’s all because I kicked my mother in the face and Karma is out to get me. Nonetheless, despite not having a niece, I have learned the most valuable lesson from having nephews. You’ll love them just the same. It never really mattered what the gender was. No matter what, you’ll hold that baby for the first time and instantly fall in love. How could you not? Seeing them there completely dependent and trusting on you to hold them and keep them safe? There is no better feeling than knowing that this baby is going to grow up someday and hopefully look up to everything that you do.

In that moment, you realize just how important it is for you to be a great role model for this little baby. It took me a little while before realizing that my nephew was watching everything I did and learning from it. But when I did finally come to this realization, everything changed. It was then, as a freshman in high school, I started to strive to leave a path for my nephews to follow in my footsteps. I tried my absolute hardest to get good grades. I realized that my hardest wasn’t always going to be enough. I came to learn how to face really difficult situations and overcome some honestly terrible high school drama.

The first three years of high school were by far the worst years of my life. But they made me stronger as a person. In my last year of high school, I decided to make a huge change by facing the obstacles I had pushed to the side. I got more involved. I joined a new group after school. I made new friends, who didn’t start drama. I put forth every ounce I had to end my high school career on a positive note and learn from the negatives.

And my nephews were by my side through everything.

They were there to make me smile, even if they didn’t know it at the time.

They were there to push me to be a better person.

They were there to motivate me to do my best.

They were there to make me do silly things just to see their cute smiles.

They were there to give me comforting hugs.

They were there to be my prom dates when I didn’t have one.

They were there to see my walk across the stage and receive my diploma.

And yes, I was looking for them first in the audience.

When you first think of becoming an Auntie, you think about how you are going to have to be there for your niece or nephew throughout everything. How you are going to be their biggest supporter. How you are going to encourage them to always do their best and be the best person they can be. How you are going to teach them new things.

But me?

When I think of becoming an Auntie, I think about just how much my nephews have actually given me. They were my biggest motivation through everything I attempted. They were some of my biggest supporters. They taught me so much more than I could ever teach them. And not to mention, they have never stopped loving me.

Today, nine years later, I have to come realize just how much of a blessing becoming an auntie at a young age was for me. My nephews changed everything about me and made me into the wonderful person I am today. In fact, they are the reason I want to become a teacher. I could not thank them enough for all the motivation they have given me. From that moment on, I have tried my best, no matter how far away I may be, to be there to support my nephews in anything they do.

Their first steps.

First words.

First hair cuts.

Their first baseball games.

Basketball games.

Pre-school graduations.

First day of school.

Every birthday.

Every holiday.

Every second, every minute, every hour,

every day, every month, every year.

For the rest of my life.

Because they aren’t going to stay little forever and they surely do grow up way too fast.

And I wouldn’t want to miss a single thing.

 

Once you realize how much you take away from receiving the name “Auntie”, everything will change. It truly is the biggest blessing.

Funny · Jobs · Life's Milestones

Work, Work, Work, Work, Work

((Yes the title is from Rihanna’s song))

Yesterday was my first day at my first real job. The first day on a new job is pretty nerve wracking to be completely honest. You feel pretty lost and confused since you’re in a place where you don’t know what to do yet. Anyways, in honor of my first real job beginning I wanted to write a blog with my thoughts at work throughout the day. Disclaimer: this could take some funny turns.

The day before:

  • I work tomorrow…
  • Yay! Money!
  • I’m so excited!

Two hours before the shift starts:

  • LOL I have a job.
  • I don’t want to go to work.
  • But my bed? And Netflix?
  • Why do I have to wear this uniform?
  • Why do I need to have a job again?
  • Oh right, college loans.

Getting ready:

  • I’m so excited!
  • I love people!
  • Yay! Money! (again)
  • This uniform isn’t that bad, I guess.
  • Do I have everything?
  • Don’t be late!
  • Am I forgetting anything?
  • Can’t be late!
  • Where is my badge?
  • CAR CAR CAR CAR CAR.
  • Of course, traffic.
  • These people do not know how to drive.
  • I hate people.

Arriving at work:

  • Must sign in on time.
  • Where do I go?
  • Oh, hi coworkers.
  • Definitely forgot something.
  • But what?
  • Oh well. I’m sure it’s not important.

Beginning of the shift:

  • ENERGY.
  • WHY DO I HAVE SO MUCH ENERGY.
  • I can’t wait to have customers.
  • WORK
  • Wait, how does the machine work again?
  • Oh gosh, I forget where everything is.
  • WORK
  • I forget my pin code, again.
  • I should really memorize that.
  • WORK
  • Must clean everything.
  • Spotless. Customers are coming soon.

Middle of the shift:

  • The busy time is over, I hope.
  • WORK
  • I hate people so much.
  • WORK
  • I’m glad I remember where everything is now.
  • WORK
  • Be efficient.
  • WORK
  • ALMOST DONE I PROMISE.

Almost the end of the shift:

  • I really hate people.
  • Wow, I’m tired.
  • Tip me. Please.
  • And hungry.
  • THAT’S WHAT I FORGOT. I guess it was important.
  • Yay, more customers.
  • Tips much appreciated.
  • THE BUSY TIME WAS NOT OVER.
  • I REPEAT THE BUSY TIME WAS NOT OVER.
  • Legs. Jello. Can’t move.
  • Jello? OMG FOOD.
  • When is this day over?
  • I’m going to quit.

End of the shift:

  • Last customer of the day, whoop whoop!
  • Quick, lock the doors before they see us.
  • Can I leave now?
  • I don’t want to clean up.
  • I declare death by work.
  • CAR CAR CAR CAR CAR
  • I really really hate people.

Driving home:

  • At least I don’t have to work tomorrow.
  • Sleeping in is going to be wonderful.
  • Oh how I miss my bed.
  • Can this person in front of me go any slower.
  • Of course, traffic.

At home:

  • I’m so tired.
  • I’m so hungry.
  • Bed.
  • Sleep.
  • Netflix.
  • Food.
  • Heaven.
  • Happiness.
  • I’m never going back to that place.

A couple hours later: (& a good rest)

  • This job really isn’t that bad.
  • I actually enjoyed working today.
  • Maybe I won’t quit.
  • Well, I couldn’t afford to anyways…
  • I don’t have to work tomorrow.
  • I feel like I’m forgetting something?
  • Wait, what day is it today?
  • Oh, I guess I am working tomorrow.
  • Yay! Money!

It really is just an endless cycle isn’t it……

College · DIY Projects · Life's Milestones

DIY Dorm Project (Part 2)

Now that graduation for most seniors is coming up fast, the available dates for graduation parties are quickly being filled up. This month’s DIY Project is for your party guests to sign at your graduation celebration.

Today’s DIY Project is: a canvas for friends and family to sign at your graduation party!

Materials:

  • An 18 by 24 inch canvas
    • I got mine from Michaels, but you can find them at any craft store. You can vary your canvas size, I just had a lot of people and family attending my graduation party.
  • Acrylic Paint
  • Pencil (for sketching out before hand)
  • Paint Knife
    • For this project, I bought a set of six similar to this. I ended up using the second to last one at the bottom. It is bent at an angle and was easier to use for this project. I used this to created the flowers made on mine, so if you don’t plan on making those this is not needed. plastic_pallet_knives.gif
  • Paint Brushes
    • Preferably a larger one since you are using a larger canvas.

Step 1:

Paint the base color of the canvas with a large paint brush. I just left mine with the teal colored base but you could do multiple colors if you wanted. I also tried to make my colors match the colors of my dorm room supplies.

Step 2:

Stencil out with the pencil “2016” where you want it. Make sure you write lightly on the canvas after it dries incase you end up changing your mind as the pencil can be difficult to erase. You can use a piece of paper for a template to make sure you write in a straight line. Hint: I did mine diagonally, but you can also make the canvas horizontally, vertically, etc. Be creative!

Step 3:

Trace over where you stenciled out your design in paint! I used a larger brush about an inch wide to do this part so I wouldn’t have to keep making it thicker and so that all the numbers were the same thickness. It just made it easier to do for me.

Step 4: (optional)

For this step you’ll use the plastic paint knife to create a flower design. Place paint on the bottom of the paint knife and create 5 petals of the flower in a circle. You may have to dip the paint knife in paint a couple of times. Using the knife gives a three-dimensional affect on the final product. I painted a bunch of these on mine but, it’s ultimately up to you how many you add if you end up adding them! You could also create flowers with simply using a smaller brush or add something else other than flowers. Again, be creative!

Tip:

Be creative, but also make sure you leave enough space for friends and family to write on. I didn’t really want a lot of writing on my numbers or flowers.

Step 5:

Set out on a table at your party with sharpies for family and friends to sign and write little messages on!

Good luck! Comment a picture of your final product!

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Life's Milestones · Relationships

6 Things My Ex Taught Me

We all have that one ex who we totally regret going out with. I definitely do. But thinking about it, I realized that it taught me a few things. Here’s what they are.

1. To love myself

I’ve definitely began to love myself more. I’ve never had an issue with low self esteem. But after the break-up, I became more self aware of how beautiful and great I am. I wasn’t going to let some boy tear my down. I don’t need him in order for me to feel good about myself.  I’m not trying to sound arrogant, but I think it’s important to love yourself! I’ve never felt more attractive and fierce than I do now.

2. What I want in my future husband

My ex had some good qualities but also a lot of bad qualities. When I start being interested in a guy, I look for the bad qualities that my ex had. Now, I know nobody is perfect. I just don’t want someone like my ex. He taught me I deserve better and to never settle for less.

3. To never let any guy talk me into anything I’m not comfortable with

My ex was very manipulative. I had my set of limitations and he would always beg and find a way to get what he wants. So I learned to never give in and stand my ground. If he’s a good man, he will respect you and won’t try and make you do anything.

4. To be more independent

We were long distance so I traveled a lot by myself. Flew all over the place by myself (including Alaska) and drove to South Carolina by myself. So I guess that’s one good thing about being with him. But I’m also talking about not being dependent on him. This goes back to the first point. I don’t need to depend on a boy to be happy.

5. To trust my gut instinct 

There were a lot of times in the relationship where I had this certain feeling or thought that he did something he shouldn’t have. I would always be like “no, he wouldn’t do that” and then I eventually find out I was right. So now, when I’m with a guy, I know to trust my feelings and confront him. You just never know!

6. To love others more

I had so much love for my ex at one point. So what was I going to do with all that love after the break up? Give it to my friends and family! I’ve never loved or appreciated them so much before. I’m grateful everyday for each of them. My family is amazing. My friends are the best. They all show how much they love me everyday. I don’t mind being single when I have them. But I do look forward to meeting the man I’m supposed to marry.

College · gifs · Life's Milestones · Summer

10 High School Musical Gifs That Explain How Graduating Feels

As the last final exams are being placed into the computer systems and being graded, there is just one thing left for the seniors of 2016, graduation. If you’re in high school it’s been a long four years waiting for this day. If you’re in college, well, it could be anywhere from four years to five years to six years… you get the point, it’s been a long road for you to get here and your handwork is finally paying off.

Here are 10 gifs from High School Musical to perfectly explain how graduation feels.

hsm2

Getting ready for the big day like…

hsm1

How you feel on stage…

hsm3

When family asks you how it feels to be a graduate…

hsm4

But then you remember, graduation means no class, which means it’s summer!

hsm5

This is how you want to walk across the stage to accept your diploma or degree.

hsm6

And then you remember, graduating means moving on and leaving friends.

hsm7

When family asks what you’re career plans are

hsm8

For a minute? More like the past four years…

hsm9

Saying goodbye doesn’t mean you can’t come back to visit!

hsm10

Just remember… we’re all in this together!

An Open Letter To.... · Life's Milestones · Relationships

Dear Future Husband

Dear Future Husband,

Hi. It’s your wife. I hope you’re doing well and not doing anything stupid to mess up our future. I think about you a lot. I wonder what you look like, what your voice is going to sound like, what your personality will be like… One thing I know for sure is that you’re going to be perfect for me. I bet you’re really funny and you’ll make me laugh all the time. I also bet that you’re really handsome. We will have beautiful children (that I’ve already named. Hope you don’t mind). I can’t wait to see you as a father. My family will love you. I’m sure you’ll fit right in with all the goofiness. I hope my best friends will love you. They probably will because I don’t want to be with anybody my friends hate. My best friends are very protective of me. They will like you but if you do anything to hurt me…just watch out. But you’ll be perfect so I wouldn’t worry about it. I can’t wait for movie nights together at home. Let me pick out the movie every once in a while, okay? It will probably be a Disney movie or a chick flick and I’m not at all sorry. But I do hope you love Disney as much as I do. That’s very important. We will probably go to Disney World for our honeymoon. Our wedding will be beautiful. Not only because of the decorations and me, it will be beautiful because of the love we share. I’m so excited for that day. You’ll quickly learn that I’m a little high maintenance. I like things a certain way. I have my little quirks just like everyone else. But I hope you learn to love them all just like I hope to love all of your little quirks. I’m sure we will annoy each other a lot. But that’s normal! I want to annoy you for the rest of my life. I can’t wait for all the little adventures we will go on together. All the vacations and even the disastrous vacations that we will look back and laugh at. I can’t wait for the mini adventures like going hiking at Old Man’s Cave or going to the Columbus Zoo or the Cincinnati Zoo that I will make you take me to because of the sloth they have there. I hope you accept my sloth obsession. It’s a little ridiculous but whatever. I can’t wait to go to sleep and wake up next to you every morning. I’ll try to make you breakfast most mornings. But I love sleeping in as long as possible and I also can’t cook. But I’ll learn to cook! We definitely have to cook dinner together sometimes. I’ve always thought that would be fun. I promise to try and clean up my messes. You might have to be the clean freak in the relationship because I tend to be a bit messy, sorry. I’m sorry this letter is all over the place. I’m really just writing down whatever comes to mind. You don’t know me, and I don’t know you. Or maybe we do know each other and haven’t realized it yet. But I love you and I can’t wait to meet you. God has the perfect timing.
Love, Your Future Wife.

Life's Milestones · Relationships

Today is The Day

Well… Today is the day I would have woken up with butterflies in my stomach and a special glow on my face and say “I’m getting married today!”. Today is the day I would have been too nervous and excited to eat. Today is the day I would have gotten pampered and beautified. Today is the day I had waited for my whole life. Right now I probably would have been drinking Starbucks with my bridesmaids while getting our hair and make up done. All of us giddy with excitement. I’m sure I would have had so many thoughts going through my head. “Wow. I’m actually getting married.” “What is he going to think of me in my dress?” “I hope everything goes smoothly today” “what if the reception isn’t decorated how I imagined it would be?!” “I hope what’s-her-face doesn’t actually show up” “I wonder what he’s thinking..” “I’m going to be a WIFE!”. So many nerves. Next, I would be putting on my wedding dress. Beautiful ivory ball gown with a sweetheart neckline, some lace at the top that flows onto the skirt, beading in the back that starts at the top and goes all the way down the skirt, and to add some bling, a beautiful jeweled belt. My dream wedding dress would have been blush, but settling for this beautiful dress was okay, right? Probably not. At 2pm, we would have started to head to the ceremony spot and get in our spots. I can only imagine the thousands of butterflies in my stomach at this point. 2:30pm comes around and the music would start to play. One by one my bridesmaids would walk out. My daddy by my side probably telling me he loves me and is proud of me. Now is the moment…I would have stepped out in the open and immediately look at who I thought was the love of my life. Now I would walk down the isle, my dad would give me away, we say our vows, give each other the rings, and hear the preacher say “you may now kiss your bride”. That would have been the start of a very unhappily ever after. I’m thankful what I thought would be the happiest day of my life didn’t happen. I’m thankful I didn’t marry a man who was married to his career. I need to be second to God, not his career. I’m thankful I didn’t marry a man who always made me feel like I was in a competition with other girls. I don’t need to be told constantly about all the girls who “want” him or try to flirt with him. I’m thankful I didn’t marry a man who would always be on his phone when we were together because “there’s nothing else to do” because I “never talk”. Maybe if I actually felt like he cared or listened to all my random thoughts, I would have talked more. I thought my world was ending the night he told me he didn’t love me the way I should be loved anymore. But now I see that my world got brighter and happier. I’m able to find someone who I deserve and who deserves me. I’m thankful that I’m the one that got away. Today is the day I smile and say “I’m not getting married today”.